


Making Bacon Pancakes

by charmandu



Category: Wanna One (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, M/M, One Night Stands, Student-Teacher Relationship
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-05
Updated: 2019-03-20
Packaged: 2019-07-07 06:42:05
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 18,083
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15902952
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/charmandu/pseuds/charmandu
Summary: Jaehwan's one-night stand before his first day of senior year turns out to be his professor in his afternoon class, Professor Hwang Minhyun.





	1. One truth, one lie

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first time writing a fic so please let me know how I can improve. Tell me anything in your mind. I love minhwan so much I gave it a shot--we need more content! Haha
> 
> Thank you! uwu

Like every bad relationship Jaehwan has had in the past, it starts with a one-night stand. Well, he swears that he was just being nice when he offered 'them' breakfast the morning after (he makes killer pancakes) but one breakfast would lead to another and then he’ll only realize it when it’s too late.

“Jae, I thought we’ve discussed that you will never make breakfast again after one night of unattached sex?” Ong, his best friend who also lives in the same building, commented with rolling eyes and a sigh. It has been exhausting for him to mend Jaehwan’s broken heart especially if it roots from the same thing over and over again. "It's like you never learned."

“I know, I know but I get easily hungry especially with all the—”

“I don’t need the details! But what made you break the pact, huh? His eyes? His abs? Oh it’s his abs isn’t it!”

“Well…” Jaehwan glanced at Seongwoo only to see that his eyes are squinted on him. He diverted his gaze on the lunch his been poking ever since they got into the university cafeteria.

“Kim Jaehwan, you can’t be weak! Remember the long journey we’ve been through just for you to forget all the heartbreak. We almost burned down our own building!” Jaehwan laughed at the memory. That one was a really bad breakup. They were going out for about 11 months already (Jaehwan’s longest!) and they were approaching their anniversary.

It was in the middle of February so it was still cold. They were supposed to go out the day after Valentine’s to avoid the crowd but it was apparently so his boyfriend at that time could take out his girlfriend who just came back from an exchange in Japan. Saddest part was they've been together for three years.

Jaehwan felt like a trash after that. Number one, he didn’t really want to be cheated on more so to use him to cheat on someone. He doesn’t want to be the reason another soul is in misery like him.

Seongwoo was with him through that. Millions of advice were given and Jaehwan can't take it all seriously because Seongwoo is not an expert on love. Ha, he can’t even talk straight in front of his crush.

Jaehwan burnt everything that would’ve reminded him of the bastard. A picture of them and a plate of pancakes was starting to catch on fire when Seongwoo held his wrist and said with a stoic voice “Don’t make pancakes for anyone ever again.”

Hence the pact.

Who would’ve thought that Jaehwan would crumble at the mere sight of abs?

“I don’t regret it though. He was like a god, Seongwoo.” Jaehwan has given up on his lunch.

“You don’t regret it now, sure. Why can’t you start a relationship like normal people? Be friends with him, get to know him, then date. You’re doing it the other way around!” Seongwoo stood up to put his tray on the shelf for used utensils. Jaehwan followed.

“What’s our next class?” Jaehwan asked while he was looking for his schedule in his knapsack. There are just too many crumpled papers in there.

“It’s Social Deviance. The professor was indicated as to be announced when we booked it.”

“Oh no, I hate TBA professors. They’re normally the scary ones since no one will book their class if their names are shown.” Jaehwan has started to comb his bangs to hide his eyes. That way, he wouldn’t be attracting attention from the professor nor his classmates.

Seongwoo sat in front because he claims his eyes get watery if he tries too hard to see what ‘s written on the board. Jaehwan sat behind him.

It was decided since their first year that Seongwoo will never finish university if they sat beside each other in class because Jaehwan just comments on everything. Now, Jaehwan writes his comments on his notebook and Seongwoo will be his sounding board after the class.

Since it’s the first day for this class, there’s still nothing to review. So Jaehwan went back to bugging Seongwoo.

“Seongwoo, he was just like a god, you know. When I saw him yesterday at the pub, I didn’t even think he would approach me. He was lean, he was gentle and polite, his voice was very sweet, and he smiles like the Miniso penguin I’ve been asking you to buy for me for my birthday!”

“Jaehwan, don’t tell me you’re falling for this guy already? You don’t even know him yet!”

“But it felt like I know him from somewhere—"

The classroom door opened. Only one hand went in, trying to reach the light switch. It seems that the professor is still talking to someone while he was trying to dim the lights of the classroom. Everyone in the room tried to fix their stuff and their posture before the professor came in.

“Oh my god, Seongwoo.” Jaehwan lifted his bangs to better see that their professor is in fact, the god that he was referring to. Seongwoo looked at him, and then the professor, and then back at Jaehwan.

Seongwoo whispered angrily, “This is him? This is penguin guy?”

“Don’t call him penguin, he might hear you! Oh god use your broad shoulders to cover me, Seongwoo.” Seongwoo straightened up his clothes to be subtle on shielding his best friend from the professor.

“We'll do introductions first before I discuss the syllabus,” Professor Hwang Minhyun announced to the class. “Please stand up, introduce yourself, and tell the class two things about you—one truth and one lie. The class will guess which is which and then you’ll explain to us the facts you said.

Seongwoo looked at the back and whispered “You’re dead!”

Jaehwan is already panicking but he still answered “Don’t you think I know that!”

The professor started first. “I am Hwang Minhyun. I am just a lecturer here in the university, which means I am not permanently employed here. The faculty got me because there was an interest in the subject so they opened this class.”

A lot of things were already in Jaehwan’s mind. What if they became a couple? How will he see him again? Does he live far? Maybe he could stay in his tiny studio apartment when he’s in town. If he’s not permanently employed here, it means we could be a couple after this! Jaehwan mentally slapped himself to stop him from all the daydreaming.

“I am currently taking up my masters but my undergraduate thesis was focused on social deviance so here I am now.” He paused to smile and Jaehwan almost died. He almost squirmed but then he remembered the images when they were doing the deed just last night. He suddenly cleared his throat as possibly as he could.

“Okay, two things. One, my past lovers are all good singers. And two, I am a good singer as well.” Seongwoo’s eyes widened and he instantly looked at Jaehwan who’s clearly breathing faster now.

A few of his classmates answered randomly. “Number one is a lie.” “Sorry professor, but I think number two is a lie.” Jaehwan’s brain is haywire. _Did he hear me sing while I was making breakfast? Am I already considered in the past? Am I his lover? If he has a good voice as well, maybe I can write a duet?_ Slap. The slap was real and his cheeks stung. Jaehwan has got to pull himself back to the ground and stop this nonsense. It was a one-night stand for god’s sake.

Unless… unless he’s hoping?

“Shhh,” The professor tried to pacify the class as they started discussing Minhyun’s one fact and one lie. “Number one is a lie, I’ve never had a lover before,” the class went awwww, “but I’m hoping that the next one has a nice voice because after fact number two, I would love to sing with them if given the chance.” This time, the professor looked at Jaehwan in the eye.

Seongwoo saw the whole non-verbal interchange. He took a mental note to tease him after the class.

Up next was Seongwoo who has given his signature speech about his surname. “I am not a model and my best friend Jaehwan is single.” The class burst to laughter. Prof. Hwang blushed but he covered his cheeks with his hands and was quick to add, “That wouldn’t be considered since it’s not about you.”

Seongwoo laughed at the comment but he continued, “I am not a model and I am the human reincarnation of the traditional instrument Haegeum.” The class roared of laughter once more but Ong Seongwoo began to imitate the said Korean instrument. Everyone was trying to suppress their laughter but they clapped after the performance.

Prof. Hwang confirmed the fact: “So you’re a model, Mr. Ong?”

“Yes. And my best friend Kim Jaehwan is single.” The man behind Seongwoo pulled him to sit down. Jaehwan was just so embarrassed. He suddenly remembered how he was approached by Professor Hwang at the pub last night.

“How come you’re alone?” Asked Minhyun. He leaned to the bar where he put down his drink, not forgetting to put a coaster.

“What do you mean?”

“You look like someone who could easily steal a heart, you’ve already stolen mine, actually.”

Minhyun was not sure if he was still the one talking or it’s the alcohol. He was very nervous about his first class tomorrow and he was just so grateful it was in the afternoon. He believes that he’s under qualified for the teaching position but the faculty had pushed him to accept it since all of them have been his professors when he was an undergrad and they testified to his abilities. He saw the chance as giving back to the academe so he said yes.

Now the courage that he has right now, he thought, is being mischanneled. The bravery and the courage he was asking for was for facing almost same-aged people and teaching them what he loves—sociology, not for asking the cute guy sitting at the bar.

Jaehwan blushed so hard it could be mistaken as the Asian flush. He tried to hide his face through drinking a few more from his bottle. But after the gulp, Minhyun was still looking at him directly. Damn, he’s already soft for this guy, this was just unfair. Minhyun let his glass go, stood very near Kim Jaehwan and turned his revolving seat towards him so that they’re now face to face.

They are almost of the same height even if the younger was sitting. Minhyun leaned and rested his elbows on his thighs, mimicking an almost-hug, making Jaehwan taller than him. The older looked up and was surprised when Jaehwan’s right hand has made its way to cup his cheek.

They’ve looked at each other’s eyes for a solid seven seconds. It was Jaehwan who broke the silence.

“Can I kiss you?”

“Please. Please introduce yourself.” Jaehwan found himself standing in front of the class. His classmates have gone quiet meaning he could’ve stood there for a long time daydreaming about the foreplay with the class’ professor yesterday night at the pub.

His eyes went wide at the realization—he’s standing beside Professor Hwang.

“Uh, hi. I’m Kim Jaehwan. This is my last year in the university.” He forgot the one truth one lie he prepared while Seongwoo was introducing himself so he wings it. “I’m not a good singer and I am not single.”

“But those are both lies!” Seongwoo yelled. A few of their classmates giggled.

“Ugh, shut up Seongwoo. Fine, fine. I’m not a good singer and I am single.” The class went yieeeee. Jaehwan suddenly realized he just applied for the vacancy in Professor Hwang’s heart. “Tha-that’s not what I meant. I am not applying to be your lover!” The class just laughed louder. Jaehwan went back to his seat, feeling defeated.

The class was dismissed early. The professor had just given their reading assignment for next week—something about crimes and jails.

“Speaking of crimes. I think our professor is very hot and you scoring one on him last night should be counted as a crime.” Seongwoo teased Jaehwan.

“Could you be any louder? The whole university couldn’t hear.” Seongwoo was going to shout about it to grant his sarcasm but Jaehwan have already slapped his palm on the other’s mouth to prevent any nastier things he’ll try to say that could taint his and the professor’s image.

Before they turn right on the next corridor, Professor Hwang Minhyun called Kim Jaehwan’s name.


	2. The fruit doesn't fall far from the fool

Jaehwan dropped his hand from Seongwoo’s mouth. Never mind the saliva that was still wet on his palm nor the students bumping on him because he stopped at a busy corner. He stopped dead and oh god he’s heard his name with that voice before. That angelic voice that seemingly has echo, is solid and without hesitation. The student couldn’t piece it altogether. It was not very familiar, it’s something he only discovered he’ll crave and long for even if it was not technically his to claim.

Oh. It was just last night.  

It wasn’t as loud. Last night’s was more of a prayer. “Kim Jaehwan.” Minhyun said like his name already has a meaning, like it was a spell meant to put someone in a trance. Like his mouth has been saying his name for his whole life.

Kim Jaehwan has heard his name a million times—from his mom especially when she’s mad, from the bullies in elementary school, from his first confession in high school, from the graded recitation in college—but not like this. His name rolls in Minhyun’s tongue like it’s second nature.

The younger almost choked, almost sobbed. But he can only manage “I am here.”

“Let’s get out of here.” Minhyun straightened his posture, offering his hand to Jaehwan.  Jaehwan slid from the bar stool to stand up. They were standing very close to each other but there was no awkwardness. It might be the alcohol or it might be that this man is just so attractive.

“My place is near here.” Jaehwan offered.

“Lead the way.”

It was then that Jaehwan realized that he had made his way to the professor just in front of their classroom. This is the second time he has walked towards the professor without his full knowledge. Is he this attracted to the professor? “I’m sorry, what?” Jaehwan realized that Professor Hwang has said something. He was looking to his lips and noticed that they were moving.

“The pancake you made this morning was the best one I’ve ever tasted.” Professor Hwang was careful to look out for Jaehwan’s reaction

Jaehwan pretended to look around to hide his smile. He has a million questions in his head: _are we flirting? Is he asking me out? Does he want to visit again so he could eat ~~me and then the~~ pancakes? Oh my god, are we dating?_ It was a second or two when he realized that he is still in fact, in front of the professor and that he has to give some sort of response.

“You can have it again, if you want.” Mental face palm, Jaehwan! What is he doing? He thought he was going to avoid him as much as he could. Where is Ong Seongwoo to control the situation and prohibit him from saying something more embarrassing.

“Hello Professor Hwang, I don’t mean to intrude but Jaehwan and I need to be in another class.” Seongwoo was all smiles for the professor. It could only mean one thing though—Jaehwan’s going to receive a mouthful of sermon from his best friend. Again. Professor Hwang smiled back and let them go.

What Seongwoo said to the professor wasn’t true. They actually have an hour and a half before their next class. “Seongwoo you’re a lifesaver. How did you know when to butt in?”

“Jae, we’ve known each other since we were fetuses. I think I know the face you make when you’re flirting.” Seongwoo slung his arm on the shorter’s shoulder and pulled him closer as if they were planning on hijacking something. “Spill it.”

“I was not flirting!”

“Your body language says otherwise, Kim Jaehwan. What did he tell you?”

Just in time, they arrived at their usual hangout place. It was under a tree near the Sociology building. There is a bench surrounding the tree. The breeze is starting to be cool and it was enough to keep them fresh.

Already in the bench are the second years they’ve met when Jaehwan was busking in the streets of Hongdae, near the university last year. Jaehwan was still a freshman and the three approached him, saying that they will attend the same university next year. They were nervous but asked if he and Seongwoo could give them tips so that they could easily adjust to university life. After a few more hangouts, they just knew they clicked.

“Hyung, you look so gloomy. What did you do to him Seongwoo-hyung?” All eyes were suddenly on Jaehwan and Seongwoo. Lee Daehwi and Bae Jinyoung looked at Jaehwan like a worried mom. Lai Guanlin on the other hand, stood up and saluted to Seongwoo. It was a running joke between the two.

Guanlin suddenly blurted out that Seongwoo looks like an airplane pilot when they were packing up after Jaehwan’s busking gig where they met. Seongwoo, being the joker that he is, saluted to Gaunlin instead of thanking him for the compliment. It became a habit after that. Sometimes, Guanlin calls him captain Ong.

“What happened to Jaehwan-hyung?” Jinyoung asked Seongwoo. Among the three hubaes, Jinyoung has the smallest face but the biggest heart. He’s always protective about them even if there’s actually nothing to be worried about. It’s like somebody’s hurt him or something and he doesn’t want his friends to experience the same.

Ong Seongwoo was smiling widely. He was definitely enjoying this. “Well, our little _mandu_ here saw his date last night.” Jaehwan appreciated that Seongwoo did say “date” instead of you know what. They’ve grown close with each other in their years of friendship but the situation is already embarrassing as it is, he doesn’t want to add more fuel.

Daehwi was the first to react. “They study here as well? Ooh, Jjaeni-hyung could be one of those couples who PDA in front of the garden. Yuck!” Seongwoo and the sophomores laughed.

Jaehwan was starting to get annoyed but Seongwoo answered the question for him. “Guess what? He was our professor in our class this afternoon.”

“Oh no.” The younger three said in unison. They were waiting for Seongwoo to proceed or at least for Jaehwan to react. Their mouths hang open, unsure how to take in the situation. Jaehwan could feel sweat pooling in his temple. When did it became hot?

“I know, I know! It’s bad. It’s inappropriate. I will be expelled!” Jaehwan’s voice was a little higher when being defensive. His hands were mindlessly pulling and playing with his plaid long sleeves. He was nervous and he was trapped. _Should I just drop this subject?_ No, the units he got was just enough to even be considered a part of the graduating class. _Fake it till I make it?_ But how would he fake his feelings?

_Wait, feelings?_

Apart from all the daydreaming he’s been doing since Minhyun went out of his apartment, Jaehwan has thought about all the horrors that their “future” relationship could entail. Breaking the pact totally means something. What he saw in Minhyun was still yet for him to uncover.

He was strong for almost two years now and then he bends? _Should I cut it already? Should it stay as a one-night stand? Is he attracted as much as I am?_

Seongwoo sat beside Daehwi while Jaehwan sat on the grass, still feeling a little uneasy. “As your best friend on duty 24/7, I have already given you the advice not to give out breakfast after one-night stands. Your pancakes will give them the wrong idea and you will suffer another heartbreak. No good love story starts with a good fuck.”

Jaehwan shoots a sharp glance to Seongwoo. He trusted him!

“And here I was, thanking the gods that you branded it as a date and not a one-night stand. I take it all back.” Jaehwan snapped at his best friend.

“Hyung, wasn’t it awkward? I mean, you saw him naked and all and now he’s your professor. Didn’t you even talk? Know his profession, his background, no small talk at all? Aren’t teacher-student relationships a little bit, I don’t know, taboo?” Daehwi is rambling. Out of the five, he is the strategist. Him asking these many questions mean he’s stuck and he’s trying to figure out how his hyung could get out of the situation.

“I hate you, Seongwoo. My image has been damaged.” Jaehwan looked up to Seongwoo to give him a disapproving look. But then he sighed and continued, “You know, I wasn’t even expecting him to acknowledge me. It was supposed to be a one-night stand! But just before we got here, he called me and told me that this morning’s pancakes were the best he’s had.”

Dramatic gasps were heard from the four. Guanlin broke the tension. “What did you say, hyung?”

“Well,” Jaehwan started to touch his nape in embarrassment. “I said he could have it again if he wants.” All of the four did a full-on face palm. Some of them groaned. Jaehwan’s reply wasn’t what they were expecting the senior to answer. It dawns on Jaehwan that he shouldn’t have said that to the professor. His actions wouldn’t be seen in any other angle than flirting.

“What were you thinking, hyung! You just dove right into the flames of another heartbreak!” Jinyoung was a little red from the anxiety the situation is giving him.

“Who told you that this will lead to a heartbreak? What if we work things out?” Jaehwan stood up and sat on the opposite side of his friends just to be petty.

“Woah woah woah, Kim Jaehwan don’t tell me you’re planning on continuing this—this thing with him!” Seongwoo’s smile was gone now. He’s worried about the stupid decision his best friend is going to make.

“We’ll just see where the roads lead us. I’m not going to pursue him outright but also, I’m not going to interfere with destiny and sever the relationship early on.” Jaehwan doesn’t know where all of this is coming from. Maybe the toned abs? The blindfold? God, it’s not the proper time for him to think about his professor’s body.

Jaehwan’s group of friends totally disagree with Jaehwan’s statement.

Then, it’s as if the universe conspired against Jaehwan, a small fruit fell down from the tree and hit him on the head.

“Ow!”

“See! Even the universe is warning you of the impending pain.” Guanlin and the others laughed as Jaehwan tries to massage the spot where the fruit landed.

This heartbreak better be worth it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was thinking of making a Minhyun POV for next chapter, what do you think?
> 
> Also: did i just mention blindfold? concert minhyun gaaah


	3. I can tell (you're not used to this)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The kiss was slow and he doesn’t want to hurry. The baseball game cannot be heard anymore. Nor the guys who had just ordered another bucket. Minhyun was no longer leaning and proceeded to embrace the man sitting on the stool. The taste of Smirnoff is fighting the taste of cream and alcohol. Minhyun hasn’t tasted anything sweeter than this.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Title from the song Chivalry is Dead

It was a Monday night and Minhyun is at a bar or a pub, actually he’s not sure but there is a huge TV in front of him, playing a baseball game.

Memories of his large baseball uniform in elementary school and the dewdrops on the green, green field they played at rushed in. He had always liked playing for his team but his allergies to his sweat (it was salt, actually) has forced him to quit the team.

It’s his fourth glass of Bailey’s and his eyes are starting to blink slower than usual. The alcohol has gotten into him. _The class tomorrow will be fine._ He’s trying to convince himself. Out of all the back and forth of his nervousness, of the courage and discouragement, he’s still at a loss.

Not accepting the lecturer job at the university where he’s taking his masters was never an option. The faculty and the colleagues have actually locked him in since he displayed his talents in the field when he was still an awkward sophomore. On the bright side, it’s one of the ways he could give back to the academe.

Minhyun’s main cause of anxiety (tonight and in general) is that he knows he’s not good enough. No matter what his grades say or his teachers say, it’s just going to be different. He knows he is a good student but who knows if he will be a good teacher? It is a big role change! The students for tomorrow are even probably of his age so what gives him credibility? The faculty is giving him too much credit and he’s just so afraid he couldn’t live up to it. He’s disappointed his family once or twice, he couldn’t bear to disappoint the faculty who he sees as his second family now.

The internal monologue has started to get annoying. Tipsy Minhyun has been cheering himself up but the scared Minhyun inside of him would always have a rebuttal. Being skillful in the field is one thing but being confident that he’s good enough is another. The pressure and the fear are pulling him.

He unlinked his cuffs and loosened his tie. He completes the move by running his hand through his hair. The noise has toned down and probably only a few people are around. It was a Monday, anyway. His eyes have wandered to see who’s still here--probably in the same wallowing pool as him. The couple talking in the corner table near the clock looks like they are about to go. The group near him has just ordered another bucket of beer.

Minhyun looked at his drink, thinking why he’s downing a creamy alcohol instead of a bitter one. Realization struck him that the taste of milk in the beverage is comforting him down—he’s not here to forget anyway. He’s here to find courage for tomorrow, amidst comforting himself about going out of his comfort zone. Thank _Kami-sama_ that his class is in the afternoon.

It still early but he’s realized this courage _thing_ cannot be found in this place. He raised his hand to call the waiter but when he looked at the bar, a beautiful man was sitting alone on a bar stool drinking his Smirnoff, bottoms up. Minhyun has focused on the man’s Adam’s apple, bobbing after every swallow. A drop of the drink escaping his lips, tracing the jawline guarding his cheeks. _Oh, his cheeks are cute._ _Mandu,_ his mind supplied.

The waiter beside Minhyun cleared his throat. Apparently, the waiter’s been there, holding his bill while Minhyun was having a feast with what he’s seeing. The customer laughed quietly to fight off the awkwardness. Looking up to the waiter, he asked for a new glass of Bailey’s and the bill of the man on the bar.

The drink (no ice) was delivered to him after he paid for both of their bills. It was a little surprising that the man has already finished five bottles and he’s still holding an unfinished one. _Is he here to forget?_ He took the glass, sighed an empty sigh and stood up. Making way for the man on the bar.

Minhyun slid between the man and an empty stool, choosing to stand instead of sitting. He gently let down his drink, putting a coaster first. He was afraid that the man will be offended, especially with the invasion of personal space but he took his risk anyway as he is feeling _courageous_ after all. _Wow, really._

He rested his elbow on the bar, supporting his head, dreamily looking at the man beside him. The man’s eyes did not widen but his pupils did. This gave Minhyun the go signal.

“How come you’re alone?” He was internally praying that the man beside him will not leave, at least without him. The man looked down on his drink first, thumb trying to peel off the drink’s label before answering “What do you mean?”

To be honest, this is Minhyun’s first time coming up to someone while tipsy. First time coming up to someone, actually. He doesn’t know how these things work but apparently, he’s smooth? Maybe the alcohol is smooth. Closed eyes, he offered “You look like someone who could easily steal a heart, you’ve already stolen mine, actually.” _Damn, Minhyun that’s smoother than a baby’s bum._

The man is now tomato red but he still managed to chuckle. He drinks his Smirnoff for a few times to hide his face. His heart is already racing faster than the speed limit. When the man has put down the empty bottle, Minhyun pulled and rotated his stool so that the he’s facing him. Minhyun didn’t know the man is capable of blushing a redder shade of uhh, red? Minhyun internally thanks Peter Kavinsky for this move.

Minhyun went closer without breaking their eye contact. Minhyun leaned closer, resting his elbows on the man’s thighs near the knees. It’s as if he was attempting to hug the man.

The older tried to smile. The man is still looking at him despite the height difference. The man has raised his right hand quite hesitantly, only to land on the other’s nape. The touch from the nape slowly moved to the cheeks. Minhyun realized that the man’s hand is cold and its trembles have gone softer. He closed his eyes and leaned to the touch. The taller wants to close the proximity already.

Without even telling his name, the man said “Can I kiss you?”

“Please,” Minhyun supplied and their lips touched. It was slow and he doesn’t want to hurry. The baseball game cannot be heard anymore. Nor the guys who had just ordered another bucket. Minhyun was no longer leaning and proceeded to embrace the man sitting on the stool. The taste of Smirnoff is fighting the taste of cream and alcohol. Minhyun hasn’t tasted anything sweeter than this.

The kiss lasted for more than ten seconds, he’s sure of it. And yet, he still wishes it could be longer or there could be part two, and part five, if he’s not being that selfish.

“Kim Jaehwan.” The man on the stool finally supplied.

“Kim Jaehwan.” Minhyun whispered with a smile, as if his name was a secret treasure chest he’d recently discovered. Jaehwan’s hands have now travelled to Minhyun’s hair. There was something in the way the taller man said his name. This will surely be playing in his mind for a long time. It was a miracle Jaehwan still managed a response. “I am here.”

Leaning against each other, the two made their way out. Jaehwan has already gotten used to Minhyun’s warmth. _Oh, this is bad._

“I forgot to pay for my drinks!” Jaehwan exclaimed upon realization. Minhyun then told him that it’s been taken care of.

The walk to Jaehwan’s apartment was quiet. Side glances were stolen and a few attempts to hold the other’s hand failed but it’s chilly outside and Minhyun could not wait to get to know the man beside him.

Cold hands clasped against each other and they were now running to the elevator. Bright yellowish light welcomed them. Jaehwan went inside first.

“Why me?” Asks Jaehwan. He suddenly realizes that he still doesn’t know the man’s name.

Minhyun’s hands were quick to pinch Jaehwan’s cheeks. “It’s your cheeks.” The taller then relaxed and cupped the other’s cheeks and leaned down to kiss him. Minhyun can’t believe he’s already forgotten how their lips were the perfect partner for each other. It was different this time. It was much more incomprehensible but he is not complaining. He dives in, knowing there’s a full universe in the man he’s kissing and he’s very much willing to explore it.

Minhyun has not kissed a lot of guys nor girls so this is new to him. Who would’ve known that this is addicting? But then he realized, maybe it’s Jaehwan who’s addicting.

Jaehwan has leaned more into the kiss. Hands trailing to Minhyun’s chest to his ~~stomach~~ abs and then he panics.  

“You’re way, way hotter for me.” He starts to stutter. “Am-am I dreaming?” Jaehwan is out of breath.

Minhyun pulled him back to the kiss. Smiling, he assured Jaehwan in between kisses. “I should” _kiss_ “be saying” _kiss_ “the same thing” _kiss_.

Minhyun kissed him again and licked Jaehwan’s lower lip and continued to kiss him on the ear. He almost gave in to the sensation but the elevator door yelled a _ding_ and it opened. Minhyun didn’t care to stop and get out of the elevator—he was just lost in the moment.

The atmosphere was hot even with the cool breeze coming in from the hallway. The elevator was closing when Minhyun pushed Jaehwan to the wall so that he could reach the button that opens the door once more. His right arm is flexing to the wall to support himself while kissing Jaehwan. _Kabedon!_ This is his second Japanese reference tonight.

The door was closing once more when Jaehwan broke the kiss. Holding the button for opening the elevator doors, they both chuckled at what’s happening. Giggling while bowing down, they straightened up and headed to Jaehwan’s unit. It was the seventh door from the elevator, just beside the fire exit.

Jaehwan pulled out the key to the door from the pocket of his navy-blue long sleeves with tiny drawings of foxes. Before turning the knob and pushing the door open, Minhyun held his hand to stop him.

“Aren’t you drunk? I don’t want you to regret this tomorrow.” This is when Jaehwan has decided that Minhyun is a good guy. He felt butterflies at the thought that the other man is looking out after him. _Chivalry is not dead._

Minhyun looked him in the eyes, pleading for an honest answer. With moonlight as the only source of light, the other’s eyes are now a darker shade of brown, or maybe it was the lust.

“I trust you.” Jaehwan doesn’t know where this blind trusting _thingy_ came from. He doesn’t even know the man’s name!

As if Minhyun’s reading Jaehwan’s mind, the taller man uttered “Hwang Minhyun.”

Jaehwan smiled and opened the door.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I still don't know how i'll continue this fic so please please let me know if you have any thoughts!
> 
> Also: i'm writing an angst one-shot for Minhwan huhu i hate PMS-ing let's ride the feels train togetherrrr
> 
> Another also: i made a new twitter acct so tweet me @charmandu27!


	4. He is home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jaehwan kissed Minhyun as if they were separated by the war of the century. Both are soldiers who stood tall, full of bravery, and clothed with armor. And yet they had to lose to different wars. Both gave their all, were wounded, and were looked down on. But at the end of the day, each other’s lips are the only victories that matter. They are each other’s kings.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1) please dont read it if you're a minor huhu you can skip this one and just go read the next update  
> 2) i updated the tags bec there will be sex  
> 3) is2g i don't know how to write smut please forgive me huhu  
> 4) also sorry for all the grammatical errors and the typos i will check it when i have time  
> 5) promise we'll go back to crack and fluff next chapter  
> 6) i've been so busy can you believe it

Jaehwan leaned on the door to close it. Minhyun faced him, tucking a stray hair behind the other’s ear. Their lips brush for a second or two and then Minhyun kissed deeper, hoping to get the same intensity from the other. It’s like he’d wanted this man for so long yet he's only discovered it now.

Jaehwan locked the door.

He pushed the taller man slowly towards the living room. The kiss was getting sloppy and messy and all over the place as both try to remove their shoes. Once free, Jaehwan jumped on the man. Minhyun gasped a soft “oh” in surprise. Jaehwan’s arms easily found their way to envelop the other man’s neck—one hand playfully tugging hair and the other splayed on the other’s back. It was _oh so easy_ and their kiss has moved on from unsure to hungry and wanting.

Beyond the reasons of being drunk, Jaehwan can’t quite fit why he doesn’t want this to go wrong. The choice between pushing this night through in his direction or Minhyun’s will surely affect how their relationship will continue. 

_Wait._

Jaehwan broke the kiss and cleared his throat for a split second and then went back immediately to the lips he abandoned, mentally slapping himself for overthinking this. He didn’t want the momentum to dissolve.

Jaehwan kissed Minhyun as if they were separated by the war of the century. Both are soldiers who stood tall, full of bravery, and clothed with armor. And yet they had to lose to different wars. Both of them gave their all, were wounded, and were looked down on. But at the end of the day, each other’s lips are the only victories that matter. After all, they are each other’s kings.

Upon entering the bedroom, the dim of the room and the smell of familiarity loosened Jaehwan up.

 _He is home_.

Minhyun’s hand slowly made its way to the small of Jaehwan’s back to better support his weight. (He’s suddenly thankful he doesn’t skip the gym.) Jaehwan’s back was warm even with a layer of clothing on. He continued to go up and under the other’s top. His skin was quick to get goosebumps after the touch. _He's feeling him._  His heart has began beating louder and he couldn’t decide if it’s because he is so damn nervous about this or just because he is very much turned on and aroused by the man with him. The heavy feeling that’s been on his chest since the elevator has now traveled below his stomach and pooled in his gut. It swirls just like he swoons.

The taller man gave a moment to look Jaehwan in the eye. He softly brushed his lips to the other’s, licking the lower lip—a hint of teasing, proposal, and danger. But Jaehwan dove in, not thinking too much.

He caught Minhyun’s lips, pushing a little tongue to go deeper and to explore for more. This is a fight he can't win alone. Minhyun let out a soft moan as the sensation is still new to him. Hell, this situation is new to him. Jaehwan squeezed the other’s shoulder as if to say that he’s enjoying what he’s hearing.  _Louder, please._  The gears are now more aligned than ever and both are now ready to flip to the next chapter.

“Sit on the bed,” Jaehwan murmured while nibbling Minhyun’s earlobe. The other responded with a groan, obeying the other’s wish. He has Jaehwan on his lap and he couldn’t think of a position more comfortable than having him in his arms, ready, and at his disposition. He pulled Jaehwan closer as if to convince the other that he is his and his alone even if for this night only. The younger man was straddling him, legs on either side. It was then that both were suddenly _very aware_ of the growing bulge in each other’s pants. Their cocks start to ache, throbbing in sync with each other's heart beat, both curious and excited.

 _We’ve been kissing for so long._ Not that they’re ranting, of course.

Both of them realized that they’ve been holding their breath for a long time now so it was a mutual decision to take a break. They were both waiting for each other.

Jaehwan stood up, a little slowly, to open the night light plugged in just beside the headboard and turned on the air conditioning. His eyes are still adjusting to the light when he saw Minhyun smiling at him, lips all red and puffy from all the kissing.

“You’re so hot, you’re like a god or something.” Jaehwan said while sluggishly on Minhyun’s lap, going back to where he left off. He raised his hand to lightly touch Minhyun's lips. A little scared that this is not true but also a little relieved that it is. Minhyun was never good at responding to compliments so he diverted the other’s attention and lifted him up, pulling him closer to his… pelvis.

Jaehwan is starting to sweat and Minhyun maneuvered to the next gear. Minhyun grabbed Jaehwan's hands and held it just above his chest. He trailed kisses on Jaehwan’s jaw, to the back of his ears, and then to his neck. Realization hits him that for the first time in his life, he wants to give pleasure. But only to this man alone. Minhyun suddenly remembers the drop of Smirnoff traveling the same path he's following. He shivered at the thought.

Slim hands trembling from too much adrenaline and energy found the first button on Jaehwan's shirt and the rest was history. Cold air touched his chest, causing him to hiss but he was smiling. Minhyun was hesitant at first to touch it. Apparently, the hesitation was too loud that Jaehwan said in a needy voice, “Lay your hands on me.”

And so the taller man obliged. His hands wandered upwards, languidly trying to remove the long sleeves Jaehwan was wearing. Minhyun is tugging the other’s shirt while Jaehwan was tugging on his hair. It was counterproductive, really. Soft moans and soft groans were their only conversation.

Minhyun moaned a plea so Jaehwan stood, looking narrowly at the man on the bed. His pupils are darker now. He was almost drooling, looking up at this man he wants to please. And then an unexpected wink was sent his way. _Good god, let me give you my life._ Jaehwan walked a step back from the bed and removed his shirt, not breaking the eye contact. It's probably their red string, really. Minhyun was slowly melting from the other man’s stare yet he couldn't get enough of it.

Jaehwan sensed his audience was enjoying the show. His cock throbbed in excitement but still, he sluggishly unbuckled his belt and unbuttoned his pants to tease the other man furthur. He pulled his pants down and he went nearer to Minhyun as he gets out of it. He went back to Minhyun’s lap with only his boxers on. _One more obstacle._

“Do you trust me?” Jaehwan solicits his consent and Minhyun nods slowly. Minhyun didn't even think something crazy will happen. He's too vanilla for that shit. His tie was then easily loosened from his collar, making Jaehwan smile. He thought the man must've loosen it up when he saw him at the pub. Jaehwan kissed him slowly for a short while, bit and tugged his lower lip quite aggresively and proceeded to wrap the tie around his head, covering his eyes. Jaehwan will now take the lead. _Or so he thought._

Jaehwan guided Minhyun in removing his silk-like blouse. He pushed him to lay flat on the bed, rearranging the blindfold as not to hurt his head. He leans his arm on either side of Minhyun’s head to support his weight.

He peppered him kisses, starting from the side of his lip quickly passing by the jaw. The effect on Minhyun was immediate and very audible. He stops by his ears to moan and kiss it torridly.

The sound of everything makes Minhyun’s eyes roll back even if they were closed. He tilts his head upward in the process, exposing himself more. His breath hitched and he almost jolted at the sensation. He grasped Jaehwan’s bare back, almost scratching down and digging his nails into the soft, soft skin almost damp by sweat. Minhyun swears this is the most turned on he’s been in. The blindfold is surely magnifying the sensations but in his defense, he did not know that the tongue could feel this good against his ear—hearing Jaehwan’s grunts while leaving no part of it untouched. Both actions send a greater desire in his guts and in his inner thighs.

Minhyun could not help it anymore and took the other’s hand and lead him to touch the bulge in his pants, all ready for him. Minhyun felt Jaehwan smirk.

“You are such a tease,” Minhyun breathed.

“It will all be worth it,” Jaehwan’s confidence made him question himself how drunk he is.

Jaehwan started again and licked Minhyun’s nipples, making him let out a strangled noise. He bites his lips to prevent him for giving Jaehwan the satisfaction of hearing him beg for more. The longer he waits the nearer he’ll snap. Jaehwan’s kisses went south.

His new discovery, Minhyun’s abs, made him want to taste the man beneath him already. He caresses it slowly, still in disbelief. “Ah, Jaehwan-ah. It’s getting ticklish.” Jaehwan felt his member grow harder. It is still surreal that he has this effect on Minhyun.

He has to speed this up. Both of them are growing impatient. He slid one final kiss on the abs before unbuttoning the other’s pants. Jaehwan stood to pull Minhyun’s pants down. The one with the blindfold hissed as cold air touched his already sensitive skin. Minhyun moved to position himself at the center of the bed. A moment of silence and Minhyun can then feel the sudden dip on the bed. Jaehwan traced the man's pelvis. Sculpted like a demi-god in a museum. He questioned if the same god made this man beneath him.

His waistbands were pulled down, freeing his length. Jaehwan held it softly at first, testing the pressure. Minhyun gulped loudly at the touch. Jaehwan was obedient and licked the pre-cum which pooled on the tip. He kissed it too. Jaehwan flicks his tongue under the head, earning a slow but loud moan from Minhyun. He knows this part is sensitive but he can never be prepared for the sensation.

Jaehwan then slowly increased the scope of his mouth’s coverage, going lower and deeper. Lips enveloping the head, sucking ever so lightly and then going deeper, tongue tracing the vein that is embossed due to the arousal. Minhyun started to whimper, giving Jaehwan the signal that he should go all the way. His hand lets go of Minhyun’s shaft and took all of him in. His moans got louder so Jaehwan got braver and sucked faster, saliva totally enveloping the length.

In all honesty, Jaehwan expected that Minhyun will be big. And oh god, it did not disappoint.

Jaehwan’s eyes are teary due to the occasional gag reflex but this doesn’t stop him from trying to reach the base. His other hand massaging the other's balls. Jaehwan relaxes his jaw for a while so his right hand doubled the work. Minhyun’s gasps and sobs have become his favorite sounds. So Jaehwan pumped faster, gripping Minhyun’s length tighter.

Minhyun almost cries “Hnnnng, I will come soon, Jaehwan-ahhhhhh.”

Jaehwan sucked Minhyun's cock one last time on the head and walked away. “Wait for me.”

The man lying on the bed suddenly regrets his decision. He misses Jaehwan’s warmth and his mouth on his dick. He’s starting to think about how Jaehwan might have left him already realizing that going home with Minhyun was a bad idea.

Jaehwan comes back with a bottle of lube and a packet of condom. He rips the foil, taking the condom out. He pumped Minhyun’s length a few more times to get it harder. Minhyun groaned, hungry for more touch. Jaehwan pinched the tip of the condom and slid it down Minhyun’s shaft. Jaehwan removed the blindfold carefully. What welcomes him is a confused look on Minhyun’s face.

Jaehwan smirked. “Oh, you’re totally top-ing. I’ve been craving for you to be inside me ever since we got here.” Minhyun understood. He was actually a little hesitant if he was to bottom. Jaehwan moved and laid down beside him, pulling his boxers down. His own dick sprang, catching the attention of the man beside him.

The taller man hovered over him, shyly asking “Sh-should I ready you?”

Jaehwan looked away from him and instead focused on the abs displayed just above him. “I readied myself when I went away for a little bit. I guess I was ummm… I want you inside me ASAP.” Minhyun’s cheeks grew hotter. He kissed Jaehwan to answer the compliment. He went lower to his neck, almost tempted to suck a hickey and let the world know that he owned this man tonight. _But that’s for lovers._ He simply argued.

Lube covered his fingers and Minhyun lifted Jaehwan’s left leg and let it rest on his shoulder. He didn't have any experience prior but it all felt just right. He inserted one finger in first just to be safe. Jaehwan nodded to him and he inserted one more. A drop of sweat trickled near his temples.

Minhyun started to scissor his fingers and waited for Jaehwan’s affirmation. “I told you, I’m ready.” Minhyun did not try a third one and instead, took his member near the other man’s entrance. Still hesitating.

“Oh please, hyung.” Jeahwan growled. Minhyun did not waste any more time. He was observant for any of Jaehwan’s probable reactions. He puts a generous amount of lube and his hand guided his member as he inserts it to Jaehwan’s entrance.

“Ahhhhh. Fuck!” A long moan escaped Jaehwan’s mouth. His hands have started squeezing the bed sheet, asking for support. This feeling, this sensation was foreign yet oh so welcome. 

Minhyun slowly pushed until his fully inside. It took a while before he moved again. Jaehwan arched his back, basing his elbow to support his weight. He's still adjusting. Minhyun pushed in until the base, even trying to spread the cheeks so he can reach farther. Jaehwan is so gone to the sensations. He doesn't even recognize the sounds he's making. He took a deep breath and leaned into him as if to say, “go on and claim me.”

“Jaehwan-ah, you’re so tight.” Minhyun grunts. Both of them are high from the feeling.

“M-move.” Jaehwan instructed.

It didn’t take long when Minhyun found the proper pattern. It was heated passion. It was like Minhyun repressed these feelings for so long he can't control it now that it's out. Every time Minhyun’s hips slam onto him, Jaehwan loses it, screaming him praises he'd never uttered before. He forgets everything except for the fact that this man is so, so good for him.

Soon enough, Minhyun hits Jaehwan’s prostate. Jaehwan jerked instantly that Minhyun was almost worried he did something wrong but out came a very satisfied sigh and a silent “There. One more time.”

Minhyun can feel that he’s near. He gives Jaehwan a sloppy kiss and grabbed the man’s cock and pumped it. A little slower at first and then it’s synchronized with hitting Jaehwan’s prostate. Jaehwan is biting his lips so hard until he can’t contain it anymore. He throws his head up and cries out loud proclamations he will never regret even if his neighbors would hear him. _Damn it,_ he’d let the whole world know that this god in front of him is giving him the best night of his life. He screams his name a few times and a few hundred more.

“Minhyuuuhhhh----ahhhhh. That. Is. So----Fuck Minhyunnnn.”

Minhyun slowed down a little, getting themselves ready. He gripped Jaehwan’s shaft like holding on for dear life. Both of them came, quite loudly, on the fourth slam of hips.

Jaehwan felt that his brain short-circuited or something and for some reason, he can’t get his eyes away of the glistening abs of the man in front of him. He put his leg down for a better view.

He was starting to feel oversensitive when Minhyun slowly pulled his cock out. A sharp inhale could’ve been heard if both of their heads weren't a little foggy. Minhyun tied the condom and threw it in the trash bin beside the night light.

Jaehwan made his way under the blankets, opening up the blanket on his left side so Minhyun could join him.

Before dozing off, Minhyun realized that Jaehwan did not have a hard time dismantling him and unraveling his rough edges. It felt like around him, it was normal to do so. He would later learn that Jaehwan had discovered himself in the process which will somehow made him proud.

The fire is now definitely stronger and brighter as compared to when it ignited during their first kiss in the pub. It may seem so quick and fast but oh honey, they will burn slow.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> shout out to hangrua for DM-ing me in twitter (@charmandu27) i know i haven't replied but i would just like to confirm that we have the same thing in mind <3 
> 
> your comments fuel me to write huuuuuhuuuuu please let me know what you think
> 
> also: i want the jaehwan blanket from lellysong gahhhh


	5. Trial and error

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jaehwan wants to say yes, that they could try and see where it leads them. But what’s stopping him?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the long wait. It was hard to decide how I'll push through with this fic. Plus, I finished a MinHwan angst fic, I'm so sorry. But if you want to give it a try, it's here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16086986. This chapter, btw, feels like a filler chapter. I hope I could bring the gang together next chapter, I miss Daehwi and Jihoon. I'm also slowly getting into the 2Park hole but I don't think I'll write for them soon since a lot of authors are already there. I'd like to dedicate more stories in this tag since MinHwan fans are very few huhu. But let me know if you have a good 2Park fic hehe I'd love to read it!

Minhyun has been standing in the hallway for about ten minutes now. The clock hasn’t struck seven yet and his not-so-brilliant plan included knocking on everyone’s door up until he knocks on the right one.

Memories from Monday night were a little hazy and he couldn’t point out if they walked much from the elevator. Ha, the elevator. He suddenly feels cold and exposed and hot all at the same time after a few images of _the elevator incident_ came into mind _._ He was looking around the elevator on his way up just to check if it had any CCTV, only to find nothing. Minhyun’s breath relaxed a little after that.

A few seconds and his heart is pounding hard again.

To think that they stopped in front of Jaehwan’s door to check if the other is still within the bounds of not regretting everything in the morning, he couldn’t quite place why he can’t remember the damn door. Perhaps it’s because he’s been to focused on looking Jaehwan in the eye. How the moon shed light on everything else except the very thoughts of one Kim Jaehwan.

The professor couldn’t relive if they went far. He was very, very nervous and at the same time very, very much lusting on the other man.

He was about to knock on the sixth door when he suddenly remembers a mailbox with a sticker of a flower. This door’s mailbox doesn’t have it. It looks bare but used. He stepped back to look at door number five. That one didn’t have a mailbox. So, it’s probably seven then?

Door number seven looked identical to the other doors but for one thing: a daisy cut-out from a magazine and was haphazardly taped near its lock. Minhyun’s eyebrow shot up and he looked at his left hand. _Maybe that’s why I bought a daisy._ Coincidence? He thinks not.

His hands are beginning to feel numb for clutching his canvas bag too much. The flower in his hand is almost dying. He holds his breath before he knocks.

The man before him is still breathtaking. “Jaehwan,” he exhales after holding his breath for so long. Jaehwan blinked once, then twice. He doesn’t seem convinced of what’s happening. He yawned without a sound. An elastic head band was on his head, pushing his bangs up. Jaehwan shrugs upon seeing Minhyun and went back inside. He’s confused AF. Should he go in? Should he just close the door and go? Is he mad?

He was watching Jaehwan’s back when he decides to go inside. It was getting colder, anyway. He gently pushed the door to close it and he places his shoes on the right corner.

Jaehwan is now in the kitchen. He’s been staring the insides of the fridge for too long now. Minhyun was careful not to make a sound as he sits on the wooden stool just beside the counter. This position gives him a nice view of the kitchen.

The younger man got two eggs from the tray and closed the fridge’s door. He placed it on the counter on the other side. Minhyun can guess that he’s still blinking slowly, as if there’s no danger that everything will fade away. The first time Minhyun saw it was during the morning after. He felt butterfly kisses on his cheeks but apparently it was Jaehwan’s eyelashes, fluttering reluctantly while trying to make sense of the world.

Minhyun wasn’t ready for this. Hell, no romantic comedy movie could have prepared him for this—the delight of waking up to someone you find cute, attractive, with a prejudice of a good personality. It was sweet. Minhyun thought if he’s been casted into a movie because this is how it feels. It feels nothing but out of the ordinary so he savored the moment. After all, he doesn’t know how long it will last.

Thinking how Jaehwan might have looked cute, especially in this ensemble of bunny pajamas and eye covers that doubled as a head band, Minhyun giggled softly. Jaehwan’s body stiffens instantly at the sound. Minhyun is now on alert. Is he finally awake?

Jaehwan slowly looked over his shoulder. Minhyun is sitting in his counter, hand supporting his head that is leaning a little to the right. He is smiling at him. “Good morning.”

“Y-yah!” Jaehwan shouted. Minhyun’s a little scared but amused. He realized he doesn’t know this man that much and going to his apartment on a Friday morning without warning might be the plot point of his murder. “Y-you’re real?”

Minhyun’s smile was hiding somewhere, he can tell he scared Jaehwan. Oops. “Am I not?”

“But you were just in my dream! How are you here?!” Jaehwan says while clutching his fluffy top just over his chest. He thinks he’s got a heartburn or something. His mind is still sleeping and he couldn’t piece together the reason this man is in his kitchen. Jaehwan closed his eyes tighter, wishing it would just be one of his weird episodes when he’s too drunk that he starts building an alternative universe in his dreams.

_But I didn’t drink last night?_

Jaehwan opened his eyes, wider this time. “You’re still here! How are you still here!” He’s panicking now.

“Calm down, Jaehwan. I needed a change of environment so I thought of coming here.” Minhyun touches his nape to hide his embarrassment. He clearly did not think this through. Reality is finally slapping him in the face with a fact that he did not consider Jaehwan’s reaction in this whole thing whatever this thing is. Him being a one-night stand didn’t even come up to his mind up until now. Oh no, he’s screwed. The one time he hasn’t calculated his moves has gotten him into this humiliating situation.

The younger man looked calmer now that Minhyun showed that he’s put his guards down. He noticed a canvas bag put down on the counter and a daisy. He didn’t put that much thought into it and instead, asked him if he wants breakfast.

Yes, Jaehwan heard himself, and then Ong. _“You’ve got to stop giving the men you bed your breakfast pancakes. It’s the one common denominator of all of your heartbreaks.”_

Jaehwan instantly turns his back and gets the eggs back in the fridge. He reached up to the cupboards and got the half-empty box of Corn Flakes. He gets two bowls, one peach and one lavender, and placed one in front of Minhyun. As if on cue, Minhyun takes out one liter of almond milk from the canvas bag on the counter.

Jaehwan smiles at this. “It’s like you know I’m having cereals this morning.” He lays a spoon on Minhyun’s bowl.

“I was secretly wishing you’d make pancakes.” Jaehwan almost coughed at this. Number 1, Ong Seongwu, the living legend, is right about the pancakes. Number 2, it seemed that Minhyun is putting a lot of thought about him visiting Jaehwan. He was wrong, of course.

It’s not that Minhyun did not think about it, let alone overthink it. It’s just that he did not plan it at all. All he knows is that he wanted to see Jaehwan and it better be soon, so he notes it on his calendar. He thought of bringing flowers, making him think that he’s already taking this seriously so he stepped down to one stem of daisy. The almond milk, he thinks, was to replace the box he finished last time because he couldn’t stop eating the pancakes. His reasons are moot.

“No more pancakes for hot guys.” Jaehwan said under his breath.

“Hmmm?” Minhyun looked up as he was pouring the corn flakes on his bowl.

“I was asking if you want to warm the milk.” Jaehwan answers. He totally heard the other and he’s already starting to blush from being called _hot._

“No need.” Minhyun smiles. Jaehwan takes notes of how Minhyun’s eyes arc like a rainbow when he smiles. It feels so genuine and familiar and warm. Jaehwan is content.

“Do you have class today?” Minhyun tensed a little when he asked Jaehwan. Awkwardness is looming in and he doesn’t know how to prevent it. He glanced in Jaehwan’s direction just as he was opening the tetra pack of the milk.

“I don’t but there’s this one professor who gave us a bunch of readings on the first day of classes and I’m starting to unlike him already.” Minhyun’s jaw drops, making him look like a fish. A split second later, he notices milk splashing on the counter. Minhyun missed the bowl.

Jaehwan laughs at this. He wasn’t mad at the mess as Minhyun expected. He almost sighed at the relief. Jaehwan was still laughing when he said “I’m sorry. I’m sorry. Were you caught off-guard?” Jaehwan gave him tissue to wipe off the accident.

Hearing Jaehwan laugh, he feels improbable. The moment is precious and he wants it to be the first of the many he will treasure.

“I-I was about to ask how you feel about it?” Jaehwan sensed a difference in Minhyun’s tone. He knows Minhyun is being careful, like he was treading an unknown territory. One wrong step and a mine could explode. Well, they are an unknown territory, it’s true.

Before knowing _what_ they are now in this setup, Minhyun would like to know first how the younger feels about _this_. If it makes him uncomfortable then he’d be quick to stand and walk away and watch from afar. One semester and he’ll be back, hopefully, to being a plain grad student teaching at the side.

“About what?” Jaehwan’s eyebrow was raised. He’s drowning the corn flakes in the milk, one by one. Eyes are focused on the bowl.

“About this?” Minhyun didn’t know he’s been holding his breath for a long time already.

“You being my professor?” Jaehwan swallowed. He’s not ready about this talk. Saying it out loud leaves a bad taste to his tongue.

Minhyun nodded. Jaehwan was trying too look for any sign of impatience but he did not find it. He then munched on a spoonful of cereals. “That I slept with my professor before knowing that he _is_ my professor?”

Minhyun nodded again. This time, he was searching for seriousness in Jaehwan’s eyes. He found guilt instead. “That images of the said professor and I _that night_ comes slideshows in my brain every time I look at that professor?” Jaehwan looks at him in the eyes

The professor blushes this time and avoided his gaze. He contested the student’s claim. “Every time?”

Jaehwan swallowed, visibly. Minhyun wasn’t able to resist to look at Jaehwan’s lips. They’re closer now. “Yeah,” Jaehwan breathes, “every time.”

“Like right now?” It was Jaehwan who nodded this time. Minhyun’s slender fingers gently traced Jaehwan’s jaw and tilted his chin up and it was him who closed their distance.

Jaehwan wouldn’t forget how Minhyun’s lips feel against his but this time it felt like it was his first time again. A whole new man is slowly unravelling himself in front of him. Cereals and spilled milk be damned. The kiss was slow and chaste but the logistics of it is making it hard for their body to be comfortable. Jaehwan still has his eyes closed when Minhyun pulled away, spreading his hands to cup his cheeks. Jaehwan surely missed the warmth. How could he deprive himself of this?

Jaehwan slowly settled down to his seat. Minhyun too. Jaehwan was avoiding eye contact at best but eyes browner than anything he’s ever seen found his. Lips still pink from the kissing uttered a simple, “I like you.”

Jaehwan has heard this a lot of times—from high school confessions to failed relationships, he thinks he’s seen it all. But this one, he wants to believe it. He’s never heard anything more genuine and sincere. He was not sure if he’s open to the idea of dating again, a professor at that. He’s confused. On one point, could he really preempt a heartbreak? What if who he’s preempting turns out to be the one person the universe picked for him?

A part of him would like to turn a blind eye as if he’s not seeing the potential of what they currently have, how it could bloom into something worthwhile. This part of him remembers. It remembers every heartache, every rejection, and every single fight he’s had with his ex-lovers. This part of him would like to turn their back on something that promises paradise when he wouldn’t even know how big the paradise is before reaching the thorns.

A part of him is saying yes. The part of him that knows how good it feels to love again and to be in every moment of it. To watch a love story unfold and be a part of it. The part of him that has been convincing him that hurting only proves he’s loved, and that the bliss of loving overpowers all known pain given by it.

Jaehwan wants to raise a white flag. This part of him is winning.

But Jaehwan is still scared. He can’t decide now for sure.

“I feel the same.” Jaehwan said like he was defeated.

Minhyun aids the sentiment. “But?”

“I’m not stuck on someone, don’t get me wrong. I’m just scared to be hurt. _Again_.”

Minhyun understands. It’s the very same reason he’s been single for so long. But he’s trying now so he thinks of the one thing that made him change his mind on this one. It’s because this time, it feels like the gears have clicked and everything’s aligned, and Jaehwan is the force that keeps it that way. It’s a weird feeling since he doesn’t even know Jaehwan _that long_.

“You don’t even know me that much, Professor.” Minhyun almost flinched at the name he called him. Jaehwan lifts his bowl and drinks the milk remaining. He was trying to hide his face.

Minhyun admits it too. It’s not like him to jump at the edge without calculating the risks.

And for a second, he wanted to give up. Their situation is a little helpless anyway. They couldn’t be seen dating or whatever as the school will probably impose a punishment on them and the professor couldn’t risk destroying both of their futures.

Jaehwan has the same sentiments. More than his internal struggle to trust again, their situation just adds up to the challenge.

“We could just see where it goes?” Jaehwan said after putting the bowl down. He doesn’t know where he got the courage.

Minhyun smiled at him. Jaehwan noticed he’s perked up and it’s like he’s seeing the real Minhyun once more.

Minhyun takes the daisy lying on the cold counter and offered it to Jaehwan. “Yeah, yeah. We could do that.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trivia: Our dog's name is Pancake hehe
> 
> Also: have u read @moiepeach's minhwan au huhu it's so brilliant 
> 
> see u on twitter hehe


	6. The price of either love or death

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jaehwan celebrates the end of midterms with Seongwu and the sophomores. He could say that he was put on the spot, hot off the grill.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm sorry it's been so long, i've been... distracted by other prompts and A LOT OF MINHWAN MOMENTS oh my god we're alive ladies and gentlemen
> 
> also pls check out @mh_dusk, it's a minhwan webzine, coming soon

Midterms were just over when Daehwi has had _enough._

“Hyung, the silence is killing me.” He breathed.

Guanlin and Jinyoung looked at Daehwi with wide eyes, a small echo of ‘oh no’ could be heard when Guanlin swallowed. Jaehwan threw a sharp look at him. The intent of flipping the pork belly on the grill was already gone.  

“What do you mean?”

The three sophomores who were previously sitting lazily on the tin stools of the barbecue place were now tensed, sitting up like attentive meerkats on the lookout. The smell of almost-burning samgyupsal is starting to linger in their noses.

Daehwi huffed as if what remains untold should’ve been apparent already.

“Nothing, hyung. It’s just… you’re smiling a lot recently and it creeps us out that you’re actually quite cool after how many months of harassing us with your odd jokes and piercing laugh.”

“So… you just miss me?”

Jinyoung replied this time. “Not only that, hyung. There’s really something different and I’m agreeing with Daehwi on this one.” Jaehwan made a dramatic gasp to tease them more. He knows what they’re talking about and this might probably the right time to bring this up given that the exams are _finally_ done. But he thinks teasing them just a little bit more would get the “academic” stress out of them and it could even be fun. For him.

Jaehwan smiled before putting a lettuce leaf filled with kimchi in his mouth. He hasn’t chewed enough of it when he spoke, “I don’t know what you’re talking about. I’m the same or…” Guanlin leaned in to hear better. “It must be the stress.” Guanlin’s a little disappointed but Jaehwan paused again. “Or the fact that you’re talking about me behind my back has inspired me to be a nicer hyung.” Jaehwan’s smirk is scary.

“Hyung, it’s not like that! See, it’s just like what you told us earlier. We miss your teasing.” Daehwi and Jinyoung glared at Guanlin. He was quick to regret what he’s said.

Daehwi rolled his eyes before putting his chopsticks down. He looked straight at Jaehwan’s eyes. The eldest of the four almost shivered. “Oh come on, hyung. You perfectly know what we’re talking about. Just answer it—are you dating the professor or not?”

Guanlin covered Daehwi’s mouth as soon as he heard him say it. They shouldn’t be heard talking about this. Especially since the place is only six blocks away from the university. There could have been patrons who are also university students. A scandal is easy to spread, let alone if it involves a student and a professor. Guanlin scanned around the area and aside from three tables filled with grandpa’s, they’re safe.

Jaehwan was probably born to be a showbiz person as he responded. He glanced at the three maknaes and smiled before answering, “What makes you think that?”

Daehwi gruntled quite loudly and Jinyoung translated it for the other two. “We don’t really have anything hyung, except for the fact that you seem happier.”

“And hyung, you’re already one of the happiest persons I know.” Guanlin added while munching on mouthful of one of the side dishes, the one with the turnip. He looked at Jaehwan directly, as if to say ‘and that’s saying something.’

Jaehwan almost nodded, because as a matter of fact, it does.

The _accidental_ bliss happened after he and Professor Minhyun agreed to see “where _this_ could lead them to.”

He admits that the vagueness is in no sense _kind_ ‘cause it only seem to let the both of them hope on something they might not be able to reach. But anyway, they’ll see where _this_ takes them.

Seongwu arrived at the barbecue place just about when Jaehwan is to speak of the truth already. Wind blew and the chill of the outside made the diners shudder after the door opened proudly presenting a well-dressed Ong Seongwu.

He saw the squad immediately. He settled on the empty slot beside Jaehwan and Jinyoung.

“What are you talking about? Y’all look serious.” Seongwu began to remove his coat, placing it on top of his backpack which rested near his feet, just under the table. He poured soju on his small glass, drank it, and hissed at the sensation. The soju will probably help him warm up.

The three were looking at Jaehwan in different moods: Daehwi was raising one of his eyebrows, smiling mischievously, Jinyoung’s face is blank and waiting, looking at Seongwu and then back at Jaehwan, and Guanlin’s look had a hint of worry. Seongwu laughed just before getting his first slice of meat. He called the server to order some beef.

Jinyoung whispered to the group. “We were asking Jaehwan-hyung if he is going out with the professor.”

“What made you assume, kids?” Seongwu tried to reach for the side dish beside Daehwi and missed. Jinyoung helped him get it.

“Oh my god, Jaehwan-hyung answered the same thing.” Jinyong shook his head.

“You know how Jaehwan hyung would ditch our study group, our lunch, or our night out just so he can sleep, right?” All of them nodded except Jaehwan. Jaehwan slapped Seongwu’s arm playfully for the betrayal.

“Jae, it’s true!” The four laughed.

“We think hyung’s behavioral change were due to the fact that he’s in love or something and he’s going to our study sessions now to gain our empathy for when his heart is broken once again.” Daewhi almost got everything right.

“Hyung, I actually suggested that you might be dying or something.” Guanlin was serious.

In truth, Jaehwan didn’t like going to their study sessions because he’s accustomed to studying alone. For him, the information has a higher possibility of being retained when the surroundings are quiet. He discovered that this is still effective even if there is _someone else_ in the same vicinity, given that they will remain quiet.

The discovery happened one afternoon when Minhyun knocked at his apartment, carrying juice and a bunch of papers.

“Professor, I’m sorry I can’t let you in. I’m studying.” Minhyun pouted at the news but he tried again.

“Please? The past days have been exhausting and I fell asleep this morning when I was checking these papers. I couldn’t afford another nap.” Minhyun isn’t usually insistent but he’s already here and it would be a waste if he can’t _actually_ spend a silent afternoon with Jaehwan. He raised his right hand as if swearing in front of a court. “I promise I won’t make a noise. You just have to check on me from time to time and see if I fell asleep or not.”

“Okay,” a small smile is plastered on Jaehwan’s face. “I’ll check you out.”

“What?” Minhyun is laughing while closing the door behind him.

How could Jaehwan say no to such a beautiful face? He smiled at him and turned around to offer some biscuits.

“I brought juice.” Minhyun laid the paper on the table and placed the juice on the counter. They munched on the snacks and drank the refreshments before dealing with academics.

Minhyun settled in the couch after eating to start checking his class’ papers. It actually includes Jaehwan’s but it’s better if he will not mention it.

Jaehwan sat on the other chair, just near the bedroom door. He was fully consumed by his notes, written on recycled photocopies of last semester’s readings. He’s thankful he was able to rewrite it immediately in the library after class, making the scribbles a bit more understandable and organized. It was a miracle that his handwriting improved a lot after high school.

It must have been an hour and a half when Jaehwan looked up to Minhyun. The view was… breathtaking? It was the first time seeing the professor wear spectacles and it made him look more innocent, as if he wants to protect him from the chaos that is him.

_He doesn’t deserve me._

And it dawned on him—he’s falling and he better run before he sinks deeper and before the feeling gets mutual.

“Please don’t be mad I didn’t tell you early on.” The three sophomore’s reaction were of utter surprise, but they can’t actually say that they didn’t expect it. It’s either love or death in their list, anyway.

“Because what, hyung, you’re afraid we’ll jinx it?” Guanlin questioned Jaehwan while he was getting the wallet buried inside his oversized backpack. He put 2 bills in Daehwi’s and Jinyoung’s hands resulting into Jaehwan’s shriek.

“No! Wait. You—you betted on this?” He couldn’t decide if he’s mad as in crazy or as in angry. “I take care of my younger siblings in music and in the academe and then I get this?” Seongwu’s hysterical laughter is in the background.

“This is what you get for keeping this away for a long time.” Daehwi concluded.

Guanlin protested, “I had faith in you hyung!” He felt betrayed. His face looked like someone just told him that Santa is not real.

“Yeah, and you put your money on my deathbed?” The four are now laughing louder except Guanlin. He just lost 4,000 KRW to the two.

“So hyung, you’re really going out with the H-O-T-P-R-O-F-E-S-S-O-R?” Jinyoung’s curiosity reached his eyes once more, and apparently, his mouth too.

Jaehwan nodded to confirm the three’s theory. The three want to hear more. “Hyung, are you sure you’re going out because I’m telling you, this could be one-sided. For all we know you’re just pining.” Jaehwan felt a pinch but this is his truth.

Seongwu answered in Jaehwan’s behalf upon seeing the younger’s narrowed eyes. “They’re literally _not_ going out because they always go _in._ ”

Guanlin was waiting for an explanation but Seongwu didn’t offer it. “Please elaborate.”

“Because of our situation, you know, that he’s a… and I’m a… we’ve decided not to be seen together outside to avoid any rumors or whatever. So, either he visits or I visit.” Jaehwan spilled the tea.

“Hyung, that’s so domestic.” Guanlin just had to say it out loud.

“The feeling is mutual?” a spoonful of boiled egg made its way to Jinyoung’s mouth.

“Ooooh, good question.” Seongwu teased. He looks directly at Jaehwan while pretending to cook beef on the grill, as if he’s not asked this to Jaehwan before.

Jaehwan cleared his throat before saying, “We’re not doing feelings _yet._ We’ve decided to _see where this could take us.”_ doing the air bunnies to emphasize the verbatim reiteration.

The four hooted all at the same time at the revelation. “This is not a good picture you’re painting, Jae.” Seongwu couldn’t even lie to him.

“So, I was right. You’re being all clingy to us so we’ll be there for you when _the time_ _comes.”_ Daehwi did the air bunnies to just to tease Jaehwan back.

“As if you won’t comfort me even if I stayed stand-offish sometimes.” Jaehwan drank the last glass of soju, a slice of beef came after and settled down on his tongue. They shouldn’t really be drinking more so this is the last bottle for tonight. It’s a school night after all.

“But hyung, are you ready to love again?” Jinyoung’s voice sounded like it wanted to prove something.

“It doesn’t seem like we’re going that route. I think.” Jaehwan tried to sound convincing but he was only trying to convince himself. It’s either love or death, as the kids said. Jaehwan is hopeless.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> is2g i only know like the climax and the end of this story could someone give me an idea for the /filling/ 
> 
> p.s. im so sorry for my messy characterization huhu i'm still new to writing and i'm still getting used to it, i'll do my best to get better! thank you for still reading this huhu  
> p.p.s pls check out @mh_dusk, it's a minhwan webzine, coming soon (2) hehehe
> 
> spazz with me on twt!!! I'm @charmandu27 hehe and i think my curiouscat thing is still open :P


	7. Into You

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm really sorry it took a while to update this (5 MONTHS!!! CAN U BELIEVE)  
> i was a little stuck with the plot but now i'm back hehe, i owe to all the supportive people in twt and in cc, esp to ate Anj and Mels (hello!)
> 
> if you're here, reading this,  
> thank you for still giving this au a chance  
> it was the first one i wrote so it is very dear to me  
> (you could just see the difference in my writing lol)
> 
> also welcome to new minhwan shippers and minhwan content-creators!  
> we're a small family but we get by~

Jaehwan wakes up to a beautiful Saturday. Midterms had just ended and there are no events scheduled for this day. He guesses everyone’s bummed out of how tiring the week has been and he feels the same, really.

His phone vibrates twice just after he was stretching his arms. It’s an email notification from professor Hwang with subject: “Randomly selected: Please answer survey for my colleague”. He read the body of the email and as what Jaehwan suspected, it is a link directing him to a Google Form.

According to the email, it was for a research being conducted by Professor Hwang’s classmate in his undergraduate. The study is to find out the conventions of dating and how stereotypes could define and/or make or break a relationship. According to the instructions, the survey will only take five minutes to answer and that no personal information will be taken.

The Google form is light pink, giving him the vibe suited for love and cupid and all that cheesy stuff. A paragraph before the actual form introduced the study to him, a little similar to what professor Hwang wrote in the e-mail. Jaehwan scans the whole form and decides that it is easy enough that he could answer it even without eating his breakfast first (he doesn’t have any food left, anyway).

All questions have three options, the third one is always reserved for “Others:” and a blank for anything the test-taker might input. The first question set the mood for the whole form, “For your first date, would you rather go to: a) the movies, b) amusement park, c) others.”

Jaehwan skips the second question for it asks something in line about the first option. Since he chose b) amusement park, he went directly to the third question: “What attraction would you ride first: a) carousel, b) Ferris wheel, c) others.” Jaehwan pressed the circle beside Ferris wheel first but after a few thoughts, he changes his mind and presses c) others. A cursor and his keyboard appeared just beside the blank space.

He is smiling sheepishly when he adds his personal choice.

Jaehwan feels a little guilty for ruining the answer set but he doesn’t really give it much thought. It must only be for a small research paper as the study scope is a little too shallow, if he’s going to be honest.

The next questions are easier to answer. He chooses private car over mass transport when asked about the preferred way to travel, pineapple juice wins over milkshake, and c) others: depends, when asked about staying the night.

He submits the form a few minutes after answering and a thank you message loads on his screen. He is supposed to ignore it to steal a few more minutes of sleep when his peripheral vision sees his name with the words “be ready” and “30 minutes” right after he locked his phone. His eyes widen in surprise and unlocks his phone to clarify if his mind is playing tricks on him.

The pink background of the form welcomes him back and the crisp font of the thank you message reads:

_“Hi Jaehwan. Thank you for answering the survey. The answers you have provided will be proven helpful to me throughout the day. If you don’t remember why I am taking you out on this very day, call me. If you do, please wash up and be ready in 30 minutes. I’ll be there by then.”_

“What?” Jaehwan asks no one in particular. The silence in his room screams back and he really can’t do anything besides call Professor Hwang, or Minhyun. Right, it’s better to call him Minhyun because of _what they’re actually doing._

The other line rings three times and Minhyun answers. “I assume you don’t remember.”

Jaehwan’s eyebrows knot, “What is happening?”

“I just checked your midterms and you missed the deal by two points.”

“Which means…” Jaehwan waits.

“You’re going out with me today? You agreed! First date happens when you don’t reach 95% for midterms.”

Jaehwan inhales loudly. “And when did we agree to that pact?”

“Do you really want me to remind you.”

“Very much so please. I think my consent here is important.”

Minhyun croaks, “Wow, you’re making me look like a perv now!”

“Hyung, just tell me!”

“Okay fine. It was three weeks ago. We were at your place and you were reviewing while I was writing something. Then you came near me, to the table, asking for something but I refused because it would distract you from studying.”

 Jaehwan prolongs the vowels. “Wait…”

“Then you offered that if I’ll allow you to do what you want to do, you swear you’ll get 95% on the exam because if not, you’ll finally agree to go on a date with me.”

“What… what did I ask from you?”

“You knelt in front of me and wanted to give me a blow--”

“Okay, okay fine I remember. I’ll--I’ll get ready.”

“Okay b--”

Jaehwan cuts it a little too early because he’s so embarrassed--embarrassed that he tried to seduce Minhyun (while studying!) and that he _actually_ succeeded. He rolls on the bed, screaming.

It’s not that he doesn’t want to date Minhyun. It’s just that there’s so many things to sort out first. What if he falls? What if he suddenly has feelings for him, for his professor? What if he’d long for the second date, the third, or the fourth?

It’s true that he enjoys his company. He likes it when he comes over for breakfast, begging him to cook bacon pancakes one more time just like _that morning_. Or those times when they’d see each other in uni outside of class hours, then he’ll receive a message afterwards, saying “you look cute today” or “is that a new shirt?” Or stolen moments for when he sleeps over, tired and exhausted both from work and their recent activity that he finds himself just watching him breathe peacefully.

These are times he knows he doesn’t own! What they have now is just borrowed time. No commitments and no labels, just a thousand what ifs.

He’d like to treasure what they have for the longest time, but it hurts to feel. A part of him smacks him multiple times a day because _this is not right_ while a deeper part of him wishes for him to hold on for a little longer because it will be worth it.

Will it be worth it to feel then lose it completely, than to let go early on before you hurt yourself?

Is this how afraid he is to love again?

The doorbell rings just after he dried his hair, zapping him back to reality. He’s already wearing perfume when he opened the door.

Minhyun opens his mouth, about to greet him but he stops before he even started. The smell of the perfume overwhelms him.

“What? Is something on my face?” Jaehwan fixes his bangs and messes it again for a more ‘natural’ look--like he’s not making an effort for this day.

“No, nothing. You’re just very,” Minhyun pauses, pursing his lips before he could utter his thoughts out loud. “Boyfriend-y today.”

“I wore this polo for that sole reason.”

“Why, is it made of something special?” Minhyun probes, still breathless.

“Boyfriend material.” Jaehwan deadpans. Minhyun stops walking and he covers his cheeks with his palms. Jaehwan side-eyes him before fully turning his head. “Oh my god, Minhyun-hyung. Are you blushing?”

Minhyun stretches his cheeks before walking again, “No, I’m not.”

The elevator ride is quiet but the endless glancing at each other probably made the security guard watching the CCTV shout “get a room!”.

There is a blue car parked on the side though its hazard lights are on. “I didn’t know you have a car, Minhyun-hyung.”

“I don’t. I just borrowed this from a colleague after seeing that you’d prefer traveling privately rather than riding the train.”

“You and your colleagues.” Jaehwan shakes his head to show his fake disappointment.

Minhyun laughs before sliding down to the driver’s seat. “I’m really sorry for taking information like that.”

“It’s okay, it was creative. I’d use it to someone in future.”

Minhyun looks at him in the passenger seat, pouting.

Jaehwan messes his hair again before protesting, “What!”

“And here I am thinking you like-like me.” Minhyun’s pout is now accompanied with puppy eyes and Jaehwan’s heart hitches. He wants to reassure him that he does, that he like-likes him. It’s just that he couldn’t trust again, at least not yet.

He pinches Minhyun’s cheek in response. “Just drive, hyung. Where are we heading anyway?”

“Well, you said you liked b) amusement park and that you’d like it to be b) far-away. So, I’m taking you to a far-away amusement park.”

“Fine.” Jaehwan giggles. “This is abuse of data and authority. My answers there were genuine.”

“Then that’s better!”

Jaehwan playfully hits his arm but it only made him realize how toned it is and how he loves to use it as his anchor every time he grinds--

“You’re sweating. Are you okay? Should I increase the strength of the AC?”

“No-no, it’s okay. It’s nothing.”

“Were you supposed to do anything today?”

“Nothing really, I was going to invite you over but then I realized that maybe you may be checking papers. Weren’t you?”

“I’m not done checking but you have to commend me for starting!”

“I’ll commend you if--wait, how many have you checked already?”

“Well, I only checked yours first just so I know I won the deal!” Minhyun is grinning but his eyes are still focused on the road.

“Yah, Professor Hwang Minhyun!” Jaehwan stomps his feet cutely, like a big boy throwing a tantrum though it’s not because he is mad but because he is humiliated. He can’t imagine how his paper would have turned up to be if taken out of a pile--his views might be too strong if not compared to another essay, or his justification might be so weak if his professor checked his first.

“Ahh, Jaehwan. You just like calling me professor, huh?”

“That-that’s not what I meant!”

“Oooh, you’re sweating again. What are you thinking about?”

“Aish, stop it, hyung!”

Minhyun has his elbow on the window. He cranes his head to the left and rests his cheek on his knuckles. He drives like he’s in the middle of a movie and he looks dashing, very fit for the role.

This very scene scares him. He is comfortable and he very much wishes for the feeling to stay.

He knows it that he should not.

He takes a deep breath and asks the unaskable. “Hyung, why are you taking me out on a date?”

Minhyun is silent. He steals a glance of Jaehwan before focusing back on the road, mind somewhere else.

“What happened to just seeing where things will lead?”

Minhyun doesn’t answer. The speed of the car remains stable and he wishes he could slow down; so he could look at him with his utmost sincerity or even hold his hand to assure him he’s there, listening.

“Going out like this, wouldn’t it push things to go _that_ way?”

“Are you against the idea of us, actually dating?” Minhyun finally says with a small sigh.

Jaehwan looks at him and he knows Minhyun can feel his stare. “Please tell me you don’t believe that.”

“I don’t. And since it’s _still_ not coming from you, I can’t really be sure.”

Jaehwan’s lips draw a smile. “I guess I would just like to know where we stand. If our agreement before has changed. If we’re on the same page.”

“You should be the one to answer that, you know.”

Minhyun’s wisdom makes Jaehwan wonder more. “Maybe we could talk about this again after the date?”

They look at each other, just for a split second, and they’re all smiles. Jaehwan is looking out the window, grinning like a high school kid on his way to a field trip.

* * *

They arrive at the amusement park by mid-morning.

“Why are you still looking at me like that!” Jaehwan chides while walking backwards. Minhyun is lagging behind and they are walking towards the ticket booth.

Minhyun puts his shades on and beams, a little stupidly, at Jaehwan. “I really can’t believe you dressed up like that.”

Jaehwan gets his shades too before answering the other. “What do you mean dressed up like this?”

“You look really boyfriend-y!”

“Don’t you like that?” Jaehwan decides that he will hold himself accountable if right here and right now, Minhyun asks him to be uhh, _his._

Minhyun takes Jaehwan’s hand and kisses it. “In all honesty, I do.”

Jaehwan’s cheeks turn pink in an instant. Minhyun teases, “Is it getting too hot, Jaehwan-ssi?”

“Oh, stop it, I don’t know you.”

Minhyun just grins to the heaven. He knows this will be a good day.

The teller on the ticket booth asks them for the type of ticket they’d like to avail. Jaehwan answers ‘two adults, all-rides’. The teller proceeds to typing something on her computer, she glances at the two and at the space between them.

“Would, would you like to avail the couple promo?”

The two looked at each other and Jaehwan is just speechless. Minhyun leaned nearer to the microphone taped on the glass so he could be heard better. “What would be the benefits, miss?”

“Oh, nothing big, really. It’s not cheaper as well. But if you add 8,000KRW, there would be a souvenir photo which you can claim before exiting. There’s also an easy-access pass to the Ferris wheel so you won’t have to fall in line with the others.”

“Okay we’ll get it!” Minhyun says louder than he intended to.

Jaehwan was about to protest with a ‘wah’ but then Minhyun pushes him aside and says, “I’ll handle this, go on and be cute over there.”

Jaehwan blows air on his cheeks and walked slowly to the side with roof so he could hide from the sun. Minhyun comes in after a few minutes, holding two tickets and two red heart pins.

“What-what is that?”

“The teller said we have to wear it so that their photographer could see us.”

“That’s too cheesy.”

“And yet you’re wearing it,” Minhyun says as he pins the red heart on the younger’s collar.

Both of them went inside, two girls whispering at each other are staring at them, giggling after a few exchanges. Minhyun is almost mad, making his way to tell the girls that what they’re doing is not right and that they are making him and Jaehwan uncomfortable. But on his way to them, Jaehwan lagging behind, one of the two shouts “Both of you are handsome, oppa! Stay in love!”

Minhyun looks down in embarrassment and Jaehwan sees a deeper shade of pink in his cheeks.

He hasn’t seen Minhyun this protective, but he appreciates the gesture. “Thank you, hyung. You didn’t have to.”

“I don’t want you to feel uncomfortable, especially since it’s our first date outside.”

“It’s okay. Let’s be thankful that the girls actually find us cute.”

“Well, we are.”

“Yeah, we are.”

“I suppose you’re not going to ask me what to ride first? It was in your “survey.”” Jaehwan said sarcastically, drawing air bunnies midway.

“Do you remember what you answered?”

“Carousel?”

Minhyun laughs. He needed to bend down a little to control himself from laughing too loud.

“What!”

“You,” Minhyun laughs some more before hanging on to Jaehwan’s arm. “You said you’d ride your date first.”

Jaehwan face palms himself with both hands. A muffled ‘oh my god’ could be heard repeatedly. He regrets answering the survey just a few minutes after waking up; he regrets answering _that way_ on what’s supposed to be an academic survey; and he regrets it, that he’s forgotten what he’s written. How many questions has he forgotten due to grogginess?

“Shhh, it’s okay. It’s not like I’m going to let you ride me on the first date.”

“Aaaaah! Hyung! Stop teasing. And mind you, I actually did ride y--”

Minhyun covers Jaehwan’s mouth while they were in line to ride the roller coaster. “Kids are…” He looks around before continuing and sees that the majority of those in line are couples as well. “Never mind.”

Jaehwan releases his signature laugh. “Never knew you’d be the one to fold.”

Minhyun whispers, “Ah, the way you’re talking to me. Should I remind you that I’m your professor?”

Jaehwan tiptoes and reaches Minhyun’s ear. “Oh no, you don’t need to. I remember it so well, _sir_.” And then he leans back and winks.

The walk to the roller coaster seems long that Jaehwan wants to back out. Good thing is that he’s not full from breakfast so he could probably stop himself from puking.

They sit side by side, feet flat on the cart. Both of them says “It’ll be over in a minute.” and they smile at the coincidence. They were both nervous, apparently. Both of them held on to the hand rails on the belt securing their shoulders.

“Aren’t you too old for this, hyung?”

Minhyun’s eyes widen. “Jaehwan I’m just a year older than you.”

Jaehwan laughs and surrenders. “That’s valid.”

The ride starts with Jaehwan screaming and ends with, still, Jaehwan screaming. Minhyun cannot stop laughing because Jaehwan sounds _unique._

He arranges his hair before facing Minhyun. “Do I look okay?”

Minhyun smirks and Jaehwan is stunned, they are closer than he expected. The younger sees his silhouette on the older’s eyes, perhaps a bit more; then Minhyun messes his hair, “There, better.”

It’s Jaehwan who takes Minhyun’s arm this time. They walked down from the attraction and headed to another line to try out the Octopus which actually looks like a morphed spaghetti gone wild.

While waiting in line, Minhyun props himself on the barricade, letting his shirt trace the soft contours of his abs. “I didn’t know you could be _that_ loud.”

Jaehwan opens his mouth in shock and lets out a laugh because of the innuendo. He looks down in thought of a comeback and he has it after a short pause, “You just haven’t found the perfect position _yet_ , hyung.”

This time, it’s Minhyun’s mouth which gapes, scandalized by the reply. He straightens himself up and stands directly in front of Jaehwan. He raises both of his hands but paused halfway, hesitant to continue what he has decided on to do. Minhyun cups both of Jaehwan’s cheeks and pinches it while letting out a small squeal.

His heart races, making him choose to continue.

The height difference made it easier, smooth, and almost believably reasonable when he lets go of Jaehwan’s cheeks to pull the younger into a hug. Jaehwan is floored and confused. Minhyun squeezes him tighter, not stopping himself from expressing what he’s been keeping since he saw Jaehwan this morning, “You really are something, aren’t you?”

Jaehwan has his face on Minhyun’s shoulder, still clueless of the sudden display of affection. He whispers under his breath, “When will I become your everything?”

Minhyun doesn’t hear.

He let’s go of Jaehwan, patting his head before they move on to the platform. They are both called by the usher to sit down on seats beside each other. The ride starts, twirling and spinning in the most bizarre directions. Jaehwan is quiet this time and Minhyun is the one screaming his lungs out. This is partly because Jaehwan feels like he would puke any moment; and partly because his feelings are confusing him, pulling him left and right, just like the ride.

The ride finishes with a loud ‘wooo’ from Minhyun and Jaehwan comes back to his senses, he doesn’t really want to kill the mood of their date. He’ll think about _feelings_ later.

“Hyung, I want to puke.”

“Oh, really? Let’s go to the restroom.”

Jaehwan laughs, “Just kidding hyung. Where do you want to go next?”

“Lunch?”

“Oh, is this where you’ll use question number three? Or was that number four?”

“You chose pineapple juice.”

Jaehwan pouts. “I changed my mind, I’ll order a milkshake.”

“Would it be okay if you’ll order the drinks then I’ll order the food?”

Jaehwan shrugs, “I want pasta. Red sauce!”

Minhyun smiles before turning around. The booth for Italian food is not that far, a few steps from the table they were eyeing to occupy.

After ordering, he sees Jaehwan make his way to an empty table, putting one milkshake and two glasses of water carefully to the table. He gets the tray to put it back on the shelf, making the straw dispenser accessible for him. Minhyun sees the boy get two straws and somehow, blood runs to his cheeks. He sees the other table sipping on a single milkshake using two straws--distance too close, eyes looking at each other, and lips smiling. It’s familiar, something straight out of a movie and somehow, this excites him.

Minhyun settles quickly on his seat, placing the lasagna and Jaehwan’s meatball spaghetti on the table. Jaehwan, who’s seated in front of him, has already placed the two straws in the milkshake. He looks up at him, and Minhyun sees a child, playful and very much inspired.

The older perks up when Jaehwan puts the milkshake in the middle. He leans towards him to whisper, “Hyung, guess how fast I could drink this with two straws.”

Jaehwan sees Minhyun opens his mouth only to let his tongue out and bite it. It seems like he has something to say but decided against it.

“Did I ruin something on your mind?”

Minhyun leans on the table and spoke softly, frown not leaving his face. “I thought we were going to share the milkshake like them.” Then Minhyun tilts his head towards the other table to signal Jaehwan.

Jaehwan creates a big O with his mouth, apologetic of not getting the hint.

“Well, I still haven’t started. We could still drink it together?” Jaehwan offers.

“It’s okay.” Minhyun declines, “I just thought it would be sweet.”

“It is sweet!” Jaehwan panics. “And I’m sorry if I’m not sweet enough that I didn’t think of it. I mean, they’re literally beside us.” Jaehwan looks down on his spaghetti and pokes it with the fork.

Minhyun tries to console him. “Next time?”

“Next time.” His lips pull into a smile and the mood is okay again.

* * *

After a few more rides, they’ve finally agreed that they don’t have the energy for the more exciting rides anymore. Their heads have been shaken more than enough during their “match” in bump car and Jaehwan feels a little sticky from the Jungle Log ride.

By 5:30PM, they have decided to use their easy-access ticket to the Ferris wheel. Jaehwan thinks that they could reach the peak in time for the sunset due to how slow the ride is and the line forming for those with easy access.  

Minhyun holds out his arm to support Jaehwan.

He shakes his head, “Wow, am I a princess?”

Jaehwan almost clutches his heart at the sight of Minhyun smiling at him. He can never get used to it--someone smiling at him like this, like he holds all the answers of the world.

They sit on one side of the cart. The outside is full-on white matte, but the inside is all black and brown, like they’re in a Victorian carriage. The back of the chair is buttoned, making patterned dips on the black leather. The cart also has two speakers on the corners, playing a soft piano cover of an old song Jaehwan remembers hearing from his mother’s Walkman.

They were silent for a while and as the wheel moves, they also grow aware of the too much space between them. What’s funny is that, they’ve been alone too many times that this one shouldn’t be a big deal, but it is becoming one. Jaehwan looks at him and attempts to start something, a conversation perhaps?

Minhyun beats him to it. “Jaehwannie, aren’t you afraid of heights?”

Jaehwan hums and looks at the window beside him, “Not the heights, no. I like it actually--being able to see the sight by myself, it makes me appreciate my efforts to get here--that I was desperate enough to go. I think it feels good and it toughens up the character. The view is just a bonus.”

Minhyun nods as he runs his fingers on his hair to fill the pause. “Then what are you afraid of?”

Jaehwan bites a smile, mindful of the thin line they are threading through. He’s not sure if he’s ready to have this talk. “I don’t know. Falling?”

Minhyun looks at him as he avoids his eyes, “Yeah. I can see that.”

Of all the failed relationships Jaehwan has been through, this one is the toughest. He’s bold enough to take risks but he’s too careful to actually dive in. It was a constant push and pull and he’s getting dizzy. He knows it’s unfair and he knows it’s also killing Minhyun.

But if his past could speak, it would probably slap him with evidence that _this_ is not going to last.

Minhyun has been nothing but honest and that’s the very thing he hasn’t been with himself and with Minhyun.

Jaehwan looks back at him in the eyes and sees, _truly sees_ , how earnest he is with his feelings; and the feeling of taking their relationship seriously not only blooms but it prospers.

The older inches away from him, probably feeling the boundaries they’ve set before everything loomed in. Jaehwan thinks he’s made Minhyun see the doubts in his eyes and it makes him more vulnerable, yet the other respects it and he’s so much thankful for that.

Looking at the direction of the sunset, Minhyun fishes his phone from his pocket and opens its camera. The sunset in front of him is too beautiful to let it all pass. _A bonus,_ he thinks. _It’s what it is to Jaehwan._ A remembrance is all he needs, and one photo of the view would be enough to capture the beauty of the scenery he could view from above while wishing that the comfort of the atmosphere the two of them share could be framed perfectly.

With a light puff in his chest, Jaehwan breaks the silence. “Hyung, we still don’t have a selca for today.”

Minhyun looks back over his shoulders and gets the message. He closes the distance between them and Jaehwan has collected his courage to erase the boundary that he so much protected. Jaehwan lowers his chin to settle on Minhyun shoulders near the moles on his neck, right arm embracing Minhyun’s waist.

Minhyun holds the camera high and he does his best to get a good angle of the both of them inside the frame. He blushes immediately when he realized the position they’re in. Minhyun stares at their reflection on the LCD and tries to absorb that _finally,_ Jaehwan is opening up and closing in.

“Hyung, what are you waiting for. Take it.”

The smirk in Jaehwan’s face is priceless. Minhyun doesn’t let the chance to vanish and takes continuous shots. He leans closer to Jaehwan, as if acknowledging that Jaehwan’s gestures wouldn’t make his heart melt faster. Jaehwan is now smiling wider, eyes closed--like he has never felt more contented.

Minhyun puts the phone down, pausing to face Jaehwan. He brings his hand up and places it on Jaehwan’s nape. Tilting his head for a little, Jaehwan lets himself be guided by Minhyun. His thumb brushes Jaehwan’s cheek and he feels a peck on the forehead when he unconsciously closes his eyes again. He raises his head in search for more, more touches and more kisses.

“Knock, knock!” Shouts the usher outside. Their cart has apparently landed, and they need to get off ASAP so the next in line could get on. Jaehwan bows down in embarrassment while he takes Minhyun’s hand to run away from all the giggles. The both of them laugh too.

The sun has fully set when they’ve calmed down. Minhyun excuses himself to go to the restroom so Jaehwan waits outside, looking at the difference of the environment just because it’s the evening already.

Groups of people start to flock towards one of the main castles of the park and his curiosity leads him to it as well. By the time he realizes what’s happening, he’s already in the middle of the crowd and it’s too tight to get away. He gets his phone to send an SMS to Minhyun.

_Hyung, I’m surrounded by people already sorry. I’m here in front of the castle._

Minhyun replies, _Stay there, I’ll find you._

The first fire rocket illuminated everyone’s faces with the color red. It was gigantic and it gave birth to two sub-fireworks zooming in both directions. A collective ohh’s and ahh’s surround Jaehwan and the kids in front of the crowd, just before the manmade lake, are dancing to the accompaniment of the exhibition.

Sequential fireworks went off--in different sizes and in different shapes. The song has reached its chorus and Jaehwan can’t help but look around and see the sea of people’s reaction to the display above them. It is heartwarming for him to see everyone in the crowd looking up.

Well, except for one.

Jaehwan sees Minhyun despite the number of people around them, found each other’s eyes despite the noise, despite the occasional darkness. The spectrum of colors painting the crowd swallows them yet Minhyun stands out--not because of his height but because he’s looking at him, fondly, if he may add.

And Minhyun… Minhyun looks sublime.

Jaehwan feels breathless as he sees Minhyun let out a sigh of relief. The older starts his way to him and he can see his lips whisper excuse me’s, I’m sorry’s, and thank you’s to the people moving to give him way. Jaehwan doesn’t know why but he’s holding his breath in every stride Minhyun makes, until he stops in front of him.

He realizes, with everything dissolving into the backdrop, that this man in front of him is worth it.

Minhyun takes his hand and intertwines them, both are now looking above, at the flower bombs gracing the sky. Jaehwan feels warmth in his hand and he realizes that it’s probably the first time his hand was held like this--like it could never be let go, because Minhyun doesn’t have the strength to and because he’s fallen deeper than the both of them have ever predicted.

For the first time since this relationship began, however wrong it is, he’s admitting it.

_I love him._

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> do you forgive me for taking this long in updating (last update was oct 2018)  
> a) yes  
> b) only if you update again soon  
> c) others:
> 
> [curiouscat](https://curiouscat.me/charmandu)  
> [twitter](https://twitter.com/charmandu27)  
> i accept prompts, questions on life, love, and lgbt life, and rants abt ships, fanwars, and other fangirling stuff, i also accept fic recs!
> 
> also: i suck at making friends IRL so i'm really thankful for those who talk to me online
> 
> please let me know if you have comments on this chapter, or if you have scenes that just plays on your mind and would like to see it happen in Making Bacon Pancakes.
> 
> Also storytime: the fireworks thing happened to me in high school with my crush lol can u believe hahaha plus the gdocs idea came from my 16 year old self where I made a *program* for my crush lol it was tough learning how to code but hey, we went out for 4 years hahaha
> 
> And i want to leave you with this short poem (not mine, but i couldn't find the author)
> 
> I was so undeserving,  
> And yet, you were  
> so relentless  
> I pushed - you pulled.  
> I wept - you embraced.  
> I bled - you repaired.  
> I faltered - you shushed.  
> I stopped - you smiled.  
> I was a disaster -  
> the worst of its kind.  
> And yet, you still  
> Had the audacity  
> To let me know  
> that I was beautiful. 
> 
> i hope waiting for this chapter was worth it huhu  
> next chapter will be angst so please hold on!


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